In the name of Allah Most Gracious Most Merciful.
Murakami wrote, “we can erase memories, but we can’t erase history”. (something like that lah). But i think otherwise. I think we can’t erase memories. We can be selective on memories that we want to keep but there are certain memories that will be stuck there forever, despite us wanting to get rid of them no matter how hard we tried. To an extent that we asked ourselves why. Why do they keep lingering in our box of memories. Not knowing why they are still there despite their insignificance.
Until you cry.
Because you know those are the memories that you sacredly cherish at the same time hate. Because they are consuming you from inside.
“No matter how hard you seek reasons, presented current problems as obstacles to let things happen, you know that they don’t matter. No matter how many people you asked, seek advices and opinions from, they don’t matter. What matters is how do you feel inside.” – Amni said those painful yet truthful words to me.
Oh Lord, please lead the heart where you want it to be.